The old turtle asked the man alone along the seashore,
"Why do you speak alone?"
"Because I have a mind full of thoughts and emotions", answered the man.
"What are you talking about?"
"Of emptiness..."
"Why do you feel empty when your mind is full?", the puzzled turtle asked.
The man gazed at the ocean again. He did feel empty but at the same so many thoughts is running in his head. Maybe he had become insane because he's now talking to a turtle.
"I do not feel loved."
"And so you're not."
His eyes became watery, but maybe it was because of sea salt...
People are so obsessed of being loved; or at least attention. It is human nature, it's how we measure our worth. Men and women try to be beautiful then say what they do is not for others but for themselves. Why not try to beautiful just inside their room? Everybody's doing something to impress others to praise them.
I do not condemn this kind of living because I myself is something like this. It's just that now I feel sad because almost no one sees me, and no one really understand me. Someone said to me (a pseudo-psychologist actually) that maybe I haven't found that special friend where I can share all my thoughts and be able to understand me and I will care for every word she/he says and understand her/him, too.
I always dreamed of that special friend... I do have a special friend, but it's a complicated matter. We do care for each other and we share each others thoughts, but we never have the same interests, the same understanding...
We are all longing for affection, may it be in a form of having a relationship, a friendship, a tightly bonded group or even fans that even don't really know you they somewhat care for you.
(It's been awhile since I last wrote a somewhat serious blog... It felt kinda nice...)
my dreams, my hopes, my life
